MY DAY

So many disheartening things (I didn't want to use the word 'bad' things) have happened to me to day and I feel like screaming, crying right now.

Its amazing how things can just start falling into pieces before your own eyes and there is nothing you can do about it, since its someone or something, that's beyond your control or realm that is calling the shots at that particular time.

First of all it was computers which started breaking down, and as we speak I have five computers which I have to work on (format and do a full installation of all applications) since they have a probelm I have never seen before and the interesting thing it isn't a virus thats causing this.

Secondly I having been feeling all down and draggy as if I don't have a hold on what am doing and everything seems to be dictated to me by people who I don't even know, or have any regard to me.

If that wasn't enough I discovered that guys in my department were having a meeting with the GM, and no one even the administrator had cared to inform me and I was there with them a few minutes before the meeting actually started (I didn't go even after I learnt about it)

I have been recovering from the effects of 'sinning' last night and trying to regain my composure from all the guilt, anger and low-self esteem I have been having (that explains the draggy feeling) and trying to ask and answer the same question as to what makes me do these things even with the prior knowledge that they are wrong and the negative consequences they offer.

To add on this, the MD came by afew minutes ago and so this computer am using and started to quarrel me infront of bureauguy and smartkid and threating me with dismisal for "being in-surbordinate". Reason! I failed to take this machine to class and instead I have made it mine. So he wants this machine back in class by tomorrow, I don't have a clue as to how I will be doing this considering the amount of data and software upgrades I have done on this computer.

All this has just brought back old painful memories, which I thought were buried in the sands of time and forgotten not to be remembered anymore. So I guess bureauguy and smartkid have a reason to laugh considering what has just happened today.

I guess the best thing I can do right now is just to go home and relax first before making any choices, which can be very deterimental to me right now.

On a different note I learnt today that this guy is the founder of blogger and recently he was mentioned in the hall of fame.

And this is how my day was.